What challenges will an in-love visually impaired person face?

Today is Valentine’s Day, a very important day for the lovers and married couples! We all wish to receive presents from our other half. Sending flowers, sending chocolates or even organizing candle night dinners are some of the ways to show your love. Some people may use this special day to express their love, hoping they can win one’s heart.

按此閱讀中文版 (視障人士在戀愛和婚姻中的挑戰) .

Every love story does not only happen on romantic and joyful Valentine’s Day. Stories that stand up to challenges and trials are particularly admirable. Two students from Rainbow Missions, who are visually impaired, would like to share their love story.

My name is Yuen. I became visually impaired after an illness eight years ago, I am now a doctor of Chinese massage. My girlfriend, Ying, is also a Chinese massage doctor with visual impairment. To talk about our relationship, I have to start at the beginning when I asked her for help. At that time, my vision had just started to get worse. I went to the same university she went to for the professional degree of Acupuncture and Massage. Due to the lack of assistive devices, I was unable to read the words from the books. I was not good at Braille. Thus, my learning was very difficult at that time. I could only ask my classmates to speak out the notes for me or using the screen reading software to record information on the computer. When I asked for assistance, Ying immediately accepted my request gracefully. This was our first interaction. She gave me an excellent first impression. Although she cannot see, just like her name, she has a crystal-clear heart. Hereafter, we had a few chances to help out each other in life and study. Since then, I have been deeply touched by Ying’s gentle, kind and thoughtful character. On September of 2012, I finally expressed my love to Ying and she became my girlfriend. During our college life, since I had a lot of debt from my previous eye treatment and Ying’s family’s financial situation was not good either, I needed to do part time jobs while I was studying. We built each other up and supported each other in time of need. Although life was hard, we were very happy and content. We also had a great progress on our academic achievements. I was a straight A student while I was in college and Ying also became the top student in her class. Once we graduated with distinction, we were invited to work for different medical institutions. As new recruits, we worked conscientiously and diligently and finally won the respect disabled people deserve.

After we had entered the work force, the feelings between us were still stable and sweet. However, we started to face many challenges. First, my family started to put pressure on me. My parents are farmers. I have a brother who is seven years older than me. He also became visually impaired after a car accident when he was fourteen years old. Through the traditional concept of rural people in my village, they all think that a visually impaired person is a burden to their family. They commonly use the insulting words “blind man” to call him. The villagers’ slanderous gossip made my parents’ life very stressful. They did not respect my parents anymore. They were ridiculed. Based on my family background, with two sons under one roof, my parents refused to accept an additional visually impaired person to be my girlfriend. Like many people believe, my parents thought that Ying, who is completely blind, would become my burden and our life would be very difficult. They would rather ask me to find a girl to marry who was physically disabled, to make up for my visual deficiencies, instead of seeing Ying and I walking in the darkness with difficulty.

In addition, I have my own concern as well. Ever since I started working, I always asked myself if Ying would be a good fit as my life partner. Emotionally, we love each other, support each other and have a strong desire to live together. As a person who is visually impaired, our viability is relatively weak. After long deliberation, I even thought that we were irresponsible to each other, to our future children and even to our parents if we got married. I had experienced many sleepless nights, imagining what our life would be like in the future: Whenever Ying was sick, my heart filled with deep remorse since I had to work and was not able to be with her. I also felt helpless since she cannot go to see a doctor alone. Whenever kids need help in their studies, I feel guilty because my weak eyesight has blocked me to help. Whenever I go out, I feel hopeless because I cannot correctly identify the location. There are so many big and small problems always surrounding me. These things have given me a lot of pressure and made me feel breathless. I once wanted to give up. I think Ying should deserve a better partner than me. However, whenever I have this feeling, my heart will reluctantly not to let her go. We have been together and helping each other for years. These are all sweet moments in our life. I can always feel Ying’s love inside my heart. She is like a bright light guiding me through the darkest night, showing me my way. After a long struggle in my heart, I still want to choose the unforeseen road ahead. I deeply understand now that there is nothing more important than someone who you love and who loves you. As long as we rely on each other, we should be able to face any challenges in our lives. As long as I work hard, master my skill well and bear a man’s responsibly, I can create a lot of value, overcome obstacles, and have a bright and beautiful future ahead.

When I finally decided that Ying will be my partner in life, I told my parents about our story. Not in surprise, my parents strongly opposed our decision to be together. For months following, I have eagerly explained to my parents about Ying’s valuable character; especially how she treats elderly, how hardworking she is and how open-minded she is on things, etc. At the same time, Ying and I try to understand each other more and learn why my parents oppose our relationship. In a short period of time, Ying has learned to cook and go to work alone so that she can show my parents her independence. As time passed, my parents slowly accepted Ying.

Because of the village’s old Chinese tradition, we don’t want our marriage to bring even more burdens to our parents. We decided not to have our wedding banquet at my home. Ying’s parents also understand this. As of now, we have paid off all our debts. Our relationship is also stable and both of our parents have recognized us to be together as a couple … to start a new blessed life together. My hope right now is to find a sacred and solemn place, at my life’s most important moment, to give Ying an unforgettable wedding. There I will let her hear me sincerely say “I do” to take her as my life partner.




每一個戀愛故事都不會只停留在情人節的浪漫和喜悅裡。 經得起挑戰和考驗的故事特別令人敬佩。彩虹工程有兩位受助的視障大學生,藉此佳節,我們很想跟大家分享他們的戀愛故事:

“我的名字是源,八年前因病患成為了一名視障者,現在是一名中醫推拿大夫。我的女朋友叫瑩,也是一名視障中醫推拿大夫。談起我們兩人的戀愛經歷,還要從我第一次找她幫忙說起。那時的我剛剛成為一名視障者,進入她所在的大學學習針灸推拿專業。 由於輔助器具的缺乏,我看不到書本上的文字,也不擅長盲文,學習非常吃力。 我只能求助於同學幫我讀筆記,利用屏幕朗讀軟件在電腦上記錄重點知識。當我提出求助申請時,文靜的瑩很快回應了我的請求。這是我們的第一次接觸。我對她的印象很好,雖然她看不見,但是正如她的名字一樣,她有一顆晶瑩剔透的內心。隨後,我們在生活學習上又有多次互相幫助。在我們交往的過程中,瑩的溫柔善良、善解人意深深打動了我。 2012年9月,我向瑩表白愛意,她成為了我的女朋友。大學期間,我因為之前治療眼睛欠下了很多債務,瑩的家庭經濟狀況也不是很好,我一邊學習一邊在外兼職。我們相互支持,彼此鼓勵,雖然生活比較艱苦,但是內心很快樂。 戀愛的同時,我們的學業也取得了很大的進步。 大學期間,我所有科目成績幾乎全A,瑩也是名列前茅。 大學畢業後,我們憑藉優異的成績順利進入了不同的醫療機構工作。 踏入工作崗位以來,我們兢兢業業,勤勉不輟,贏得了作為殘障人士應有的尊重。




由於農村不良觀念的影響, 我們不希望我們的結合給父母再次帶來心理上的創傷,所以我們並不打算在家裡舉行婚筵,這也得到了瑩父母的理解。目前的我們已經償還了所有的債務,感情穩定,並且得到了雙方父母的認可,即將邁入婚姻的殿堂,揭開幸福生活的新篇章。我現在最大的願望就是在一個神聖而又肅穆的場所,在這人生最重要的時刻,給瑩一個刻骨銘心的婚禮,向她鄭重其事的說一聲“我願意”。”

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